


Sleeping safe

by AniZH



Category: Victorious
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-04
Updated: 2016-05-04
Packaged: 2018-06-06 08:18:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6746392
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AniZH/pseuds/AniZH
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jade's angry with Beck because she knows he's the reason she sleeps bad since the break-up. She drives to his RV to tell him off but somehow, she ends up coming in and both of them falling asleep arm in arm that night.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sleeping safe

**Author's Note:**

> Okay, I just love the idea of Jade and Beck actually still having at least something going on while they are broken up in the show. That's where my one shot "Texting" emerged from and that's also why this exists now.  
> Maybe, you also like the idea of that. :3 I wish you a good read either way!

Jade turns another time. She can’t sleep. She hasn’t slept all that well for the last three weeks. Since the break-up.  
She’s sick of it but her mind just can’t shut off. It’s not just the break-up itself (though she sees that damn front door of Tori’s parents’ house a million times a day in her mind) and about feeling lonely... It’s also about everything else, everything that’s not Beck-related. She knows it’s his fault though. Because she may sometimes have had trouble falling asleep but never like this. Now, she needs almost an hour each night to fall asleep and then she wakes up several times each night. She hates it so much.  
And it’s Beck’s fault. Because of Beck, her mind just isn’t at ease anymore. And it’s enough.  
She gets up, pulls a jacket over her pajamas and then shoes on before she grabs the key of her mother’s car. For a second, she hesitates, then she writes her mother a note, just in case. She doesn’t care if her mother will be angry at her for leaving the house in the middle of the night but she doesn’t want her to wake up, see her gone and possibly worry. Especially as she doesn’t take her phone with her, without a pocket or bag or anything.  
She drives to Beck’s RV and on the whole way there, her anger boils up more and more. She thinks about all those fights they have had recently, before and after the break-up, and everything that’s doing to her. She thinks of awful words she wants to throw at him without showing him how much influence he still has on her life. She doesn’t want him to know how much she still cares but at the same time she wants to rip him apart and wants to tell him how bad she feels.  
There is no light in Beck’s parents’ house but there is light in his RV. It’s past midnight but Jade still knocks loudly on the door.  
And with all those ideas she has had, all those thoughts, she still doesn’t know what she will say but she has the feeling she will finally be able to sleep well again afterwards, after she gets off of her chest whatever she will.  
He opens the door and doesn’t look too confused to see her standing there. He also doesn’t look like he has already slept and has just left his lights on accidentally, though he is in his pajamas as well – of course he hasn’t. She knows he has also slept bad since the break-up. They have known each other for a long time, have been together for a long time, and there are things they just see when they look at each other. She has seen it before that he also can’t sleep. It calms her down sometimes. It doesn’t mean they will ever get back together (she’s not sure if she would want to at the moment) but it at least means that the break-up is hard on both of them, not just on her. It’s natural as they’ve been together for such a long time and have gotten used to each other so much; it’s still good to actually see it’s the same for him.  
She even thinks he deserves to sleep bad after everything he has done, after he has broken up with her like that, but at this moment, she suddenly just feels cold and lonely, and confesses: “I can’t sleep.”  
Beck looks at her for a moment before he steps aside. “Wanna stay over?”  
She does. Suddenly, she knows there is nothing she wants more in this world right now than staying at Beck’s RV like she has done so often before. His parents haven’t wanted her to sleep over every weekend but she has done most in the end, and also has slept over some schooldays. She has gotten extremely used to sleeping in the same bed with him, even though they still have spent most nights apart.  
She passes by him without another word and he closes and locks the door behind her.  
She slips out of her shoes and her jacket and he lies down on his bed.  
She shortly glances to the couch but she feels like she has to sleep closer to him. And he has left enough room for her to lie down with him. Therefore, she does lie down next to him and it takes a few more seconds of them looking at each other, both still not totally settled in, before they move close to each other, she lies her head on his shoulder and he puts his arm around her. In that position they have slept so often in.  
It makes her feel safe instantly, and her mind weirdly calms down.  
Beck grabs his phone with his free hand while his other, that holds Jade, gently moves up and down her arm. “At what time should the alarm go off?”  
“I should get home before both our parents wake up,” she says. She doesn’t want his parents or her mother to know about this, to know she spent the night here. She knows that Beck also doesn’t want anyone to know. It’s nobody’s business except theirs. They all would just deem it weird or something.  
But she knows his parents sometimes rise relatively early though it’s a Saturday tomorrow. So, she suggests, though she hates waking up early: “Put it on 6am?”  
He nods, turns the alarm on and puts the phone away. She turns the lights off and closes her eyes.  
She knows this is weird. This isn’t what you do when you’re broken up. But it’s not like she has ever cared what you are supposed to do, right? Still.  
Though her thoughts are running wild, it takes her barely five minutes to drift off into a deep sleep.

The alarm goes off way to early but she instantly gets up. She briefly washes herself before she puts her jacket and shoes back on.  
He comes with her to the door and she’s already out and on the way to her car when he speaks the first words of the day: “Come back next week?”  
She looks back to him. That boy that she’s so used to, that she hates after everything that has happened, that occupies her mind too much, to whom she should keep a distance at least for a while. Yet, she hasn’t slept so well since the break-up. Though she still only has slept five hours this night, she feels awake and alive and well.  
“Text me if someone else is over,” she decides. She can’t text him next week before coming over. She doesn’t want someone to see a text like that by accident. But if someone is with him, maybe some new girl, she also can’t come over again.  
He nods and she leaves without them exchanging another word.

 

She comes over every Friday night from then on and they usually don’t talk much. They find positions to sleep in, without saying a word. They just talk about necessary things like when to get back up, though there are nights where it’s already clear because it’s like the last, and on those nights they don’t exchange one single word.  
She always already comes in her pajamas and always only briefly washes herself at his place in the morning.  
They don’t always wake up all that early. She parks her mother’s car down the street, so his parents don’t even notice her staying over. They usually still get up at 10am or 11am at the latest but he always goes out first and she leaves after he has made sure his parents aren’t looking.  
He doesn’t know how much her mother knows. But she usually is honest to her, she just doesn’t obey her or anything. She wouldn’t tell her she sleeps over at Cat’s or something. He therefore is sure her mother knows that she’s staying at his place though they aren’t back together. He wonders what Jade’s mother thinks about that but he knows she’s a good woman and either way she won’t probe Jade more about it. She believes Jade will make the right choices in the end.  
Beck wonders if this is the right choice. But it feels so extremely good that he tries not to worry what this means or if they should do this.  
It’s not just those nights they sleep together that feel better. Those are by far the best nights but he also sleeps better on any other night. He doesn’t know why but he does know that Jade feels the same though they don’t talk about it.  
The funny thing is that it changes nothing about them outside of these nights. They still glare at each other every now and then in school, have trouble spending time together in their group of friends and fight.  
After they have fought five weeks later on a Friday afternoon in school, Beck is worried Jade won’t come and it makes him feel sick but she still comes, silent as always, and they almost hold each other especially close that night.  
They are three months in this silent arrangements that Beck doesn’t get woken up by his alarm but by a knock and a voice: “Beck? It’s me.”  
It’s Andre’s voice and Jade has been woken up by it as well. Instantly, they draw apart from the embrace they have slept in that night.  
“Shit,” Beck breathes. “I forgot we have to do a project:”  
Jade looks at him as if she can’t believe him and whispers back: “This early? Are you kidding me?”  
“Beck? Are you there?” they hear Andre’s voice again and then him trying to open the door that’s luckily locked.  
“I’m coming,” Beck finally calls back before he explains quietly to Jade, why they have wanted to start it this early today: “It will take up the whole day.”  
“Shit,” Jade whispers and gets up, looks around but there is no chance for her to leave without Andre seeing. After all, the windows don’t even open.  
“Leave with him,” she finally decides as he gets up as well. He knows there is no other chance. He has to directly pull Andre with him somewhere else, inside the house or something, so that Jade can leave the RV as well.  
He takes a deep breath, before he opens the door, taking up the whole frame on purpose, so Andre can’t just go past him like that.  
“Hey, sorry, Andre,” he says, trying his best to act tired though he feels more than awake after the sudden surprise. “I overslept. Let’s go get breakfast first, yeah?”  
He himself is about to leave the RV to go to his parents’ house where they could get breakfast, when Andre answers: “Sure. Just let me put my stuff in first, okay?”  
He has his school bag with him, probably with some papers and stuff he has already prepared. And Beck can’t hold him back, can he? He can’t actually deny him entrance. That would make him look suspicious. So, he does let Andre step inside.  
Jade is nowhere to be seen. Beck is sure she has locked herself in the bathroom. And there is nothing in the RV that points to her having been here. Naturally the bath room door is closed. Andre won’t wonder about that.  
Yet, as he puts his things on the couch, there is a crease between his eyebrows as he looks around, to the bed and then to the bathroom door.  
“What is it?” Beck asks as casually as possible. He doesn’t know what Andre sees or believes to see what Beck misses. He has to know to make up some story. He can’t have Andre trying to open the bathroom door or something.  
Andre shrugs and slowly says, looking back at him: “I don’t know... I’m... I don’t... It just smells a lot like Jade’s perfume in here.”  
He looks a little flustered just mentioning it and Beck hopes he’s embarressed enough and he himself is a good enough actor for Andre not to notice how fast Beck’s heart is suddenly pumping.  
Okay. Shit. Of course, the RV will smell like her. It always has but Beck makes sure to let fresh air in every time after Jade has left. He loves her scent staying but he knows it could be a dead give-away. They’ve been broken up for months now after all and claim that Jade hasn’t been over really since then.  
Beck thinks fast and finally says: “Well, I did find a bottle of it yesterday and spilled it as I threw it away.”  
He doesn’t know if spilling perfume makes sense but it does make sense for him to still have found something of Jade’s in the RV. There are still a lot of her things here although he has gone through the place himself a few times and Jade also has come over herself after they’ve been broken up for a week to get the last of her stuff. But there’s still actually even one of her pillows in his bed which he has only noticed yesterday.  
Andre also seems to believe it, shrugs again, before they both leave for Beck’s parents’ house.  
He doesn’t see Jade leave but of course she is gone when they are back. He wants to text her or talk to her about it but he doesn’t dare in the end. He still doesn’t want anyone else to know. But what if Jade also doesn’t want anyone to know, thinks of it as too risky now and won’t be back again?  
He feels immensely relieved when he hears the door open a week later.

 

They text about all of this only one time.  
It’s already Friday evening when he gets her text: “Mom needs the car really early tomorrow. Next night?”  
She has obviously tried to write it in a way that wouldn’t make anyone instantly know about her regularly sleeping over in his RV. Nobody else ever looks at their phones but you never know.  
And he also doesn’t like rising too early and hates the idea of Jade already having to leave at 6am again but he also doesn’t like the thought of her not coming over tonight. She already suggests the next night and that is also possible for Beck (he wants to hang out with Andre and Robbie tomorrow evening but he can very well bid them a good night early to be with Jade) but...  
He can do a week without her but he already sleeps slightly worse at the end of the week and only feels relaxed again as she lies in his arms on Friday night. He’s sure he can survive another day. Heck, he has survived longer from time to time when they still had been together. But somehow it’s different now and... if it’s just about the car...  
“Or at your place?” he texts back.  
He can also drive to her house. He has never slept over at her place all that often but he has every now and then. And it really doesn’t make a difference where they sleep as long as they are together.  
He knows that’s just wrong because they aren’t a couple anymore but that’s how he feels. He still needs her in that way and she still needs him and that’s nothing bad, is it?  
“Sure. 11pm,” she finally texts back and with that, it’s settled.  
He doesn’t tell his parents. He guesses he will tell them some story about how he has visited one of his friends really early in the morning when he gets back. They also don’t want him to spend the night out if they don’t know about it but he is old enough and they don’t have to know everything.  
He parks his car a street away, just like Jade does at his place, and as he gets to the house, Jade already waits at the door for him.  
She lets him in silently and they go up to her room without exchanging a word. Her mother and her brother are obviously also already asleep or at least in their own rooms and don’t notice him coming in.  
They settle down on the bed and it’s only then that Beck thinks about her mother needing the car early. If her mother is away, it’s usually Jade’s job to take care of her little brother. He knows that her mother or her brother usually wake her up then. Though he guesses her mother somehow does know about these nights, he doesn’t want to be seen by her or the little brother like this.  
“Do I have to get out early?” he therefore quietly asks.  
Jade moves her face closer in the crook of his neck while she answers: “No, we can sleep in.” But she knows why he asked and explains: “It’s some school thing for Jasper and Mom is chaperoning. They will get going quite early and only come back in the afternoon.”  
Which means that, theoretically, they have the whole day with each other. But not one of them says a word about it. They turn off the light and are asleep a few minutes later.  
The next morning, they both pretend to sleep for a long time while they are already awake. They know the other pretends as well but they don’t say anything about it and act like they don’t know. They still hold each other silently and Beck almost wishes they could lie like that forever, without all the problems they have, the difficulties of their actual lives. But they will have to get up. They always have to. They have pretended like this before.

 

A month after they have slept over at Jade’s, they are finally back together.  
It’s at the same night they got back together that Jade of course sleeps over in Beck’s RV. For the first time in months they actually sleep with each other, before they settle down safely and closely in his bed.  
As he pulls Jade even closer, he says with a smile: “It’s like we’ve never been apart.”  
Jade rolls her eyes. “Because we never have been.”  
Yet, they have. They have still been around each other because they have the same friends. They have still been involved in each other’s lives. And they have been so close together once a week, slept in each other’s arms, have found safety in each other.  
But it hasn’t been the same, not even close. Which is why they of course have missed each other. They have missed each other talking, giving each other advice, exchanging looks that say everything and actually touching.  
They both know they’ve barely had a shawdow of their relationship left over the last few months though they still loved each other like crazy.  
The next kiss they share is a deep and longing one.


End file.
